Tag Archives: Humor

Music Groups on Facebook

So many people use Facebook and for those of you who don’t, well…I applaud you all! But since most of us do, you should know that there are some fun music groups to be found there. Here are some I like. If you know of others like these, by all means, let me know via a comment below.

I won’t include links on my first two suggestions because they’ll be different for everyone.

Your local or regional Symphony Orchestra. Follow them. Like them. Share their posts, help spread the word that great music is being played.

Your local musicians. Friend them. Like them. Talk to them. These people work hard and are very talented. If I thought people would be interested in hearing about the world of exports, I’d create a page for me, too, but they’re probably not. So in the meantime, let’s stick to the talented musicians who work their butts off to entertain us at concerts!

OK – here are some fun groups you may wish to follow on Facebook.

Classical Musicians - This group shares info about music from all sources, but also a lot of great pictures that are fun to share.

CM Pic 1

The painter wasn’t cited, but maybe you know who it is? Click on it for the original FB link.

Classical Music Jokes – I never get sick of these! I just don’t.

CMJ Pic 1

Nope. Never gets old!

Band Geeks - Hey – I was in marching band through college. Don’t knock it!

So this one time, at band camp…

Just kidding. Not going there. (I really need to watch that movie someday though!)

BG pic 1

I don’t really mean to pick on trombones…

Classical Music Humor - Hee hee! You’ve just gotta love a combination of J.R.R. Tolkien and classical music, right? Right. (Right?)

CMH pic Boromir

I love Tolkien!

I’m sure there are plenty more out there, but these are among my favorites.  Enjoy!

 

Humor in Music: More Jokes

Last time I posted a handful of jokes, I caught a little flak from my trombone playing friends from the Marching Hundred.  So in fairness, I’m opening this set with some jokes about my own instrument, the clarinet.

Sigh. Um, by the way, I’m the short clarinet player in the back row in this picture. Ahh…back in the days when we all played with those awful white, Vito clarinets that were supposed to provide contrast to our uniforms!  They did – for anyone within ten yards of us, but beyond that…it was pretty lost.  The capes were cool though!

IU0006

ENJOY!

1. What’s the definition of perfect pitch?

 - – When you toss a clarinet into a dumpster and don’t hit the sides.

2. What do clarinet players use as birth control?

 - – Their personalities.

3. How do you get 2 piccolos to play in unison?

 - – Shoot one.

4. What’s a minor second?

 - – Two sax players reading off of the same chart.

or…

4A. What’s a minor second?

 - – Two oboes playing in tune.

5. What’s the difference between a clarinet and a mouse?

- - You can’t hear a mouse squeak over an entire band!

6. What’s the difference between a drummer and a vacuum cleaner?

 - – You have to plug one of them in before it sucks.

7. What do you call 1,000 trumpet players at the bottom of the ocean?

 - – A start.

8. What’s the difference between a violin and a viola?

 - – A viola burns longer.

9. How do you get a bassist off your porch?

 - – Pay him for the pizza.

10. What’s the difference between a trampoline and a cello?

 - – You take off your shoes before jumping on a trampoline.

11. How do you get a guitar player to turn down?

 - – Put a chart in front of him.

12. What do you throw a drowning guitar player?

 - – His amp. 

13. How many guitar players does it take to play a Stevie Ray Vaughn solo?

 - – All of them, apparently.

14. What’s the difference between an onion and an oboe?

 - – Nobody cries when you cut up an oboe.

15. What’s the difference between an oboe and a bassoon?

 - – You can hit a baseball further with a bassoon.

OK folks – feel free to leave your favorite jokes in the comments below!  Take care!  - Heather

Humor in Music

Happy Friday!  A few months ago, I asked my friends on Facebook for some of their favorite musical jokes.  I received a fair amount but know there are still plenty more out there.  My quest for good, musical humor will always continue, but since it’s Friday, I thought I’d share a few with you.

Following are some of the jokes from the collection my friends and I came up with on Facebook.  Some of these have been around since my marching band days in high school and college and some were new to me.  They’re all good though.

After reading these, feel free to add your own in the comments below.  Enjoy!

Apologies to trombone players and percussionists and…  

1. What’s the dynamic range of a bass trombone?

 - – On and off.

2. What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombone player’s arm?

 - – A tattoo.

3. How do you get a trombone to sound like a French horn?

 - – Stick your hand in the bell and miss a lot of notes.

4. What’s the difference between a trombone and a law mower?

-  - Vibrato.

5. What’s the latest crime wave to hit the United States?

 - – Drive-by trombone solos.

6. What’s the definition of a trombone?

 - – Manually operated wind driven pitch approximator.

7. What’s the range of a trombone?

 - – About 20 or 25 yards, depending on how hard you throw it.

8. How can you tell when a drummer is at your door?

- – The knock rushes.

9. A bass player and a drummer walked past a bar.

10. What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

- – A drummer.

11. Why should you always lock your car door when leaving a set of bagpipes in the back seat?

- – Because there might be a second set back there when you return!

12. If someone is knocking at your door, how do you know it’s a female vocalist?

- – You open the door and she doesn’t know where to come in. (And she can’t find the key)

And who can resist a good lightbulb joke?

13. How many sax players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

- – Only one, but a roomful of others to argue over how Coltrane would have done it.

14. How does a soprano change a light bulb?

- – She just holds it and the world revolves around her.

15. How many trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

- – Five. One to change it and four to argue over who could have done it better.

Yes – that last one is definitely from my marching band days!  Heh heh heh!  Don’t worry – I have plenty more to share.  All things in moderation, right?  Feel free to add your own jokes below.  I’d love to hear them!

Have a great weekend everyone! – Heather

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